Film Review: SHARK WEEK (2012)

Sharks seem to be the go-to monster for a lot of horror films of the last few years and I guess they’ve run out of titles for their films as evidenced by the generic title for the film Shark Week (2012).  The film surprisingly has a couple of decent actors in Yancy Butler and Patrick Bergin who are slumming in this piece of shit of a horror film. 

Tiburon and his wife (Bergin and Butler, respectfully) have decided to gather a bunch of people together on their private island in order to force them into a gauntlet infested with sharks of all types.  It seems that they are wanting to punish the people responsible for the death of their son and since Tiburon likes sharks why not just have them get eaten one by one in the most entertaining way as possible.

The CGI is inadequate and the acting isn’t much better but I suggest this is more due to the sub par script by Liz Adams and H. Perry Horton.  The actors, at certain points, are not bad but they are saddled with such a cliché story with bad dialogue that they are simply trying to do the best they can do with what they’ve been given.  Bergin is at his worst in this film as he seems asleep at the wheel in this film (he gave a better performance in the abysmal Lawmower Man 2) but Butler (as always) seems to be the only one having any fun in this mess of a film.

Directed by Christopher Ray very little imagination is set forth and even most of the death scenes are off screen or filmed too dark and even if they weren’t marred by bad CGI this film would be a complete waste of time even for audiences that enjoy bad CGI shark movies.

Film Review: MEGA SHARK VS. MECHA SHARK (2014)

Mega sharks are the order of the day in the sci-fi film Mega Shark Vs. Mecha Shark (2014) where a prehistoric giant shark must battle a mechanized mecha shark for supremacy of the oceans.  Christopher Judge (of Stargate: SG-1) and Elizabeth Rohm (of Buffy the Vampire spin-off Angel) are husband and wife Jack and Rosie Turner, respectfully, who have created a deep sea mechanized shark with its own artificial intelligence.  They are in the middle of testing out their new toy when a prehistoric Megalodon trapped in a chunk of ice berg suddenly comes back to life.  It is up to Jack and Rosie and their Mecha Shark to take down the mega shark before it kills any more people. 

Written by H. Perry Horton and Jose Prendes and directed by Emile Edwin Smith this is a film with exactly what you would expect from a film that premiered on the Syfy Channel.  Two television stars come together to defeat a ludicrous giant CGI creature that seems to be bullet proof and impervious to all weapons (at least until the end of the film).  There’s always some annoying child that needs to be saved after continuously making stupid decisions and one of the main stars always has an Achilles heel in their past that they always have to overcome before being able to save the day in the third act.  This is what describes this film and nine out of ten of every Syfy Channel film (the tenth film is always that diamond in the rough that actually has some bit of originality that separates it from the rest of the heard).

If you like giant CGI shark films and are a fan of Judge then you might find a few moments entertaining in the film.  The CGI sharks (both the Mega and Mecha) both look horrible) but Judge actually does a better than expected job in this film.  He’s always been a dependable actor and he never phones it in.  The same cannot be said for Rohm who seems completely out of place in this film.  She has no chemistry with Judge which makes watching her on screen seem like a chore.  I generally like Rohm (who did a fantastic job while in the Angel television series and a brief stint on Law & Order) but this is probably a film in which she looked down upon.

This being said, there is still a lot of action to be had in between the saving annoying children and Rohm’s vacant performance and if all you want to see is a mega shark battling a mecha shark then this film has everything.