Zombies are the middle children of the otherworldly family. Vampires are the oldest brother who gets to have a room in the attic, all tripped out with a disco ball and shag carpet. Werewolves are the youngest, the babies, always getting pinched and told they're cute. With all that attention stolen away from the middle child zombie, no wonder she shuffles off grumbling, "Marsha, Marsha, Marsha."

- Kevin James Breaux

Saturday, April 28, 2012

Film Review: 2-HEADED SHARK ATTACK (2012)

Who really comes up with these ideas I ask?  2-Headed Shark Attack (2012)!?!   Well, anyone going into this film with anything more than the lowest common denominator should be ashamed of themselves.  If all you are expecting to see is a little nudity and some gore than that is exactly what you will get with this film.
A ship of students studying on the open see is crippled by a mutated 2-Headed shark and the survivors find themselves stranded near a deserted atoll.  Now they not only need to fix their ship, but also survive the continuing attack by the 2-headed shark and find a way off the atoll before it sinks into the sea (as earthquakes slowly sink parts of the atoll throughout the film).  The movie is headlined by former Baywatch star Carmen Electra but she does very little other than look pretty as does most of the rest of the cast.  The huge cast is made up of numerous “beautiful” and over-sexed up characters who die is less than interesting ways.  This being the umpteenth film about killer sharks there is very little contained within that you haven’t already seen before.  The draw of this film is the fact that the shark has 2-heads but even this is a small novelty as the repetition of the many deaths makes the notion of having a 2-headed shark kill two people at once repetitive and boring really fast.
There is no such thing as a 2-headed shark so the death scenes are filled with too much bad CGI.  This is because the film cannot rely on the mixture of real shark footage with that of CGI.  The other thing is that the film showcases a handful of smart characters but they continue to do “stupid” things in order to push the story forward and this also gets dull really fast.  Killer shark films have always been a hard thing to pull off since the bar was set so high with Jaws (1975) and if you’re looking for something closer to that film, 2-Headed Shark Attack is far from it.

No comments:

Post a Comment